Understanding Your Husband: BBQ

I've heard that some wives have a few questions and/or misunderstandings about their husbands. Questions often arise around the subjects of asking directions, remote controls, going to the doctor, methane emissions, Monty Python, etc etc. Every now and then I get this funny look in my eye and my wife immediately lets out a groan...yeah that's right, it's time to fire up the smoker.

Yesterday, in celebration of the beginning of my month-long paternity leave (much much much more on this stunning revelation to come), I could think of nothing finer than spending the whole day manning my smoker. OK for all you wives out there that cannot understand the appeal of BBQ let me offer the following illustrated guide.

Step 1: Meat

Step 2: Fire


Step 2.5: Fire+Beer

Step 3: Tools


Step 4: Time.

Ok this deserves some attention...smoking or BBQing takes a lot longer than grilling. Not to say that grilling is bad because I love grilling...but kind of like going fishing has pretty much nothing to do with obtaining fish, BBQing is about way more than eating BBQ. They say the appreciation of music lies in paying attention to the space in between notes. BBQ is all about the space of time. The fastest thing you can smoke are ribs and that's a minimum of 4 hours. Four hours of tending a fire in order to keep your temperatures withing a narrow range. Hours of Man-Time fiddling with a fire, drinking beer, taking pictures of my feet, whistling, and most of all doing nothing. The chance to gather your thoughts and reflect on absolutely nothing is truly remarkable. In the end though it still ends up with glorious...

Step 5: Meat



So in summary, BBQ is about...

Meat
Fire
Fire+Beer
Tools
Time
Meat

How could anyone possibly question its allure to all husbands and fathers around the world?

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